Here’s the thing about why I haven’t been blogging:
There are so many mornings where I haven’t ran. I can’t remember the last time before last night (at 10 PM. With a German shepherd. On a whim.) that I really ran. This past week, after working myself into a sinus infection and the beginnings of tonsillitis and struggling in vain just to keep myself together so I could keep going on, I stopped. I wasted time. I made myself take a breath. Sleep. And ease myself back into things.
Was I behind in work? God yes. Was I struggling to catch up? Like nobody’s business. Was I stressing out about it anymore? Nope.
The end of the quarter is always the hard time. Finals, final projects, etc., start to overload and come to a head and suddenly I’m just laid flat when it ends and I don’t have anything to do for a week or two. That’s how end of terms always are with me. With MPH@GW it’s a bit harder because I’m working my way through four quarters with only a week or so in between until December when I get the month off, so I’ve literally been in school almost consistently for close to 20 weeks. And I have two more quarters to go for this round. It’s easy, so easy, to burn out.
And friends, I am so burnt out that I am charred and krispy. Pass the ketchup, stick a fork and call me BBQ.
But I can’t stop. I can’t give up, because I still have to manage to pass my Biostatistics final and not fail the class (I’m not going to fail, no matter how much I whine like I am. I’m quite proud of how not-going-to-fail I am) and finish the grant proposal with my group for Program Planning of Disease Prevention Programs. It’s not over yet.
So what am I learning to do? Thrive. In the years between undergrad and beginning graduate school, I forgot how well I work under deadlines. How much I manage to just make things happen.
The trick is making my healthy habits happen at the same time. So that I don’t get sick. So that I don’t eat crap. So that my body doesn’t feel like I got hit by a MAC truck at the end of the day. Maybe that would be easier if the only time I can find for working on lecture materials wasn’t 5:30 AM. Or if I wasn’t putting out fires every day at work. But even without that ease, I’m doing okay.
Vegetables are my friend. Protein is good. Sleep is a requirement, not an option. Everything will still be there waiting when I wake up. Just like it will be there when I get back from my run (which let’s be honest, running for me is run-walk-run-walk-jog-walk…. I run to prove to my body that it can, not to be a runner or even for fitness. But that’s a whole other post).
And I definitely can’t forget to feed the cat.
So now I go back to working. Editing. But I’m trying to follow this wise advice, and remember how much I love the process of working through challenges, rather than focusing so much on the challenges themselves.